Old Demons
by AlwysAlve
Summary: When Naomi and Emily get back from traveling in Mexico for the summer, old demons are waiting for them to face. Suddenly, Emily's life is hanging by a thread and the guilt and anger Naomi thought she left in the past comes back stronger than ever. Now they're faced with the harsh reality that sometimes poor choices can mean life or death and, sometimes love can't make everything ok
1. Chapter 1

The front door swings open and sunlight floods the dark apartment. Emily walks inside with Naomi following right behind her. As they come in, both are giggling and smiling jubilantly. "You're a fucker, you know that?" Naomi says, chuckling as she tumbles into the door, arms filled with large bags that Emily didn't bother to help carry "You're so sweet, Naomes," Emily says with a slight, cute smirk.  
"Mmmm," Naomi replies, "I sure do try." One last time, Emily chuckles softly and then stops walking to look around the apartment before heading into the living room. "It's so dark in here," she says, making her way to the window. She pulls opens the thick blinds, and as she does there is an explosion of light, overtaking every possible inch of space around Emily and Naomi, filling their home, their entire world with brightness.

Following her into the living room, Naomi drops the luggage on the ground and leans her body against a wall, watching the way that the sunlight tickles Emily's face and reflects off her radiant, auburn hair. She looks at Emily's eyes, dazzled by the happiness and love in them, and the way they sparkle when the light hits them. She wants to say something to Emily, remind her for the millionth time how she takes Naomi's breath away every single day, but that's become nothing more then words. In her head, in her heart, Naomi figures, is where this moment is most special. Where it really means something.

After opening the blinds, Emily turns back to look at Naomi. "What is it?" she asks when she sees Naomi's dreamy facial expression.  
"Just looking," Naomi tells her.  
"Looking at what?"  
"You," Naomi admits. She moves over to Emily and wraps her arms around her. Holding Emily in this way, in their sunlight soaked home, Naomi can't help by smile. She's so fucking in love with this girl, this crazy, insane, redhead girl. She looks into Emily's eyes and can see everything about her, and everything she's kept inside. Naomi looks away, scared that maybe Emily can see everything in her too, and maybe she'd see just a little bit more than Naomi wants her to. "What is it?" Emily asks.  
"I'm really fucking lucky," Naomi says, daring to look her in the eyes again, "I got travel with you for months and now I come home to you. And I have something special in my life. I don't think you get it, I never thought I'd have anything like that at all. But you are, you are special and you're unbelievable. And I love you." Hearing this, Emily's flattered smile turns to a gentle giggle paired with a couple soft tears rolling down her cheek.  
"You always do that to me, you know?" Emily says wiping the tears away.  
"Do what?" Naomi asks, giggling as well.  
"Make me cry when I'm not sad, make me laugh. You make me happy Naomi. Even when you're being a bitch, and I'm being a tit, you're still always there making me smile. I know we have to go back to work and the real world tomorrow, but I'm not quite ready to let this go."  
"Well you know, we don't have to," Naomi says, a smile spreading on her face. Why go back to real life so early, she figures.  
"Want to go back to Mexico?" Emily jokes.  
"No," Naomi says, pulling Emily in even closer, "No, But what if you go unpack and I pour us some wine, make us some spaghetti, and we can pretend that we're still on vacation for one more night? How does that sound?"  
"Sounds perfect," Emily smiles.

One more time, Emily takes a long, deep, look into Naomi's gorgeous blue eyes and, after a reassuring smile, she leans in and meets Naomi's lips with her own. Over time, this soft kiss has become a thing that makes the apartment a home for Emily and Naomi, it's the thing that connects them, makes the flat more than just a building or four walls to live in. One more, Naomi decides, this time kissing Emily. After another smile, they reluctantly let go of one another. Naomi heads to the kitchen and Emily, after gathering the bags, heads up the stairs. Though, before they are out of each others sights, Naomi stops Emily. "Hey," she says. Emily looks down to her. "I love you."  
"I know, I love you, too," Emily shines her amazing grin and then marches back up the stairs.

As Emily walks away, Naomi takes a moment to look at her and smile. "It's good to be home," she says quietly to herself before turning around to the kitchen.


	2. Chapter 2

Emily comes to the top of the stairs with a skip in her step. Before heading into the bedroom, she stops at the stereo in the hallway and sorts through the stack of CDs before picking out the perfect one and popping it into the player. Not even a moment after she does, Can't Go Back Now by The Weepies fills the apartment with melodic sounds. Emily closes her eyes for a moment, taking the time to remember when she and Naomi danced to this entire album. One more big deep breath, and Emily turns back, heading into the bedroom with the bags.

Walking in, she throws the bags onto the bed, but they fall off the slumping mattress immediately. Emily stops moving completely as she looks around the trashed, vandalized room.

"Naomi!" Emily calls, still looking around and not sure what else to do. The bed is unmade, the blankets, sheets, and pillows thrown everywhere and the mattress slumping off of the frame. Both windows on the side wall are shattered and their torn curtains are hanging off of the rail. The wallpaper is mostly ripped apart and where it's not, it's covered in graffiti saying "dykes" or "die" or "cunts." Papers and scraps are thrown everywhere, both lamps are broken, the floor is stained with God-knows what, and the majority of their belongings are damaged and thrown about. "Naomi, hurry!" Emily calls again, terrified. Naomi burst into the bedroom from the hall. She looks at Emily initially, but then her attention immediately turns to the bedroom. It's obvious that someone has been in here, but the question is who?

After looking around, feeling terrified, Naomi gently places her hands on Emily's shoulders. "Don't move, okay?" she whispers, "Not at all. I'm going to get the bat from the hall closet. If you see anything, scream and get downstairs, okay?" Emily doesn't say anything. She can't. All that she can seem to manage is a soft nod. Quickly kissing Emily's cheek too feel safe again, Naomi moves out of the room, leaving Emily alone. Not moving her feet even slightly, Emily darts her eyes around again. She stops on the open door to the bathroom. The door has multiple holes beaten into it, and the light is on inside. She stares at it more and she swears she sees a shadow move inside.

She doesn't have time to scream as instructed before Naomi comes back behind her, shocking Emily and making her jump. "Shit," Naomi whispers, "Em, I'm so sorry!"  
"It's fine," Emily whispers back, shushing her. Having Naomi with her makes Emily feel safer, stronger even. "He's in there," Emily continues, pointing to the bathroom, "Give me that." Without allowing Naomi to protest, Emily grabs the bat from her and starts walking towards the bathroom. After a few cautious steps, Emily turns back to Naomi who is looking at her, fear flooding her face. "Get out of here," Emily tells her, "You don't have any kind of protection. Go downstairs, keep your eyes peeled, and call the cops."  
"Emily, no!" Naomi begins to resist. Her head is foggy, and she feels as though she could faint at any moment. She knows, hopes that no one is in the bathroom, but either way she doesn't want Emily in their alone. But how much can she protect her when she doesn't even know how much longer she can keep herself on her feet? "Naomes, someone has got to call the cops, alright? I have a bat, you don't, now go," Emily says sternly. Overwhelmed and not knowing what to do, Naomi turns and hurries out the door. The further away from the bedroom she gets, the more Naomi wants to turn around, protect the girl she loves, but she knows she has to call the cops. She has to get help.

Emily nods, and then turns her head and continues to make slow, quiet, cautious steps towards the bathroom door. As her foot meets the cold tile, Emily takes a deep breath and jumps inside the bathroom. That's where she finds herself standing in front of Matt, the tall, once scrawny, younger brother of Sofia, standing against the wall, soaking wet, holding a silver hand gun, and looking right at Emily with anger taking over his eyes. "That was cute," Matt says mockingly. Seeing the gun in Matt's hand, Emily immediately raises the bat, threateningly. "Matt, what the fuck are you doing here? Naomi's called the cops, they'll be here any second."  
"Naomi?" Matt says, "Well I'll have to make this quick, then, won't I?"

Matt begins hurrying out of the bathroom, but Emily moves in his way to block him. "What about Naomi, Matt?" Matt's face darkens, his eyes narrow as he slowly leans his face in until his lips nearly graze Emily's ears. "She's the reason my sister is dead, Emily. She's the reason they think I'm ill and took me to an institution. She's the reason my mum is alone, drinking herself to death. She took my life, every last bit of it. I'm going to take hers." Matt's demonic sounding words kick any sense of rational thinking out of Emily's mind and, without considering it, she yells "Fuck you!" and swings the bat at him as hard as she can. But it's not nearly hard enough. Matt falls slightly, but catches himself. He grabs his nose as it starts to bleed. Then, hurrying towards Emily, he grabs the bat to keep her from swinging it again, and smashes Emily in the face with the barrel his gun as hard as he can. The impact sends Emily falling backwards into the bedroom, her eye swelling quickly, and blood flowing out of her mouth where a tooth use to be. By the time Emily can pull herself to her feet, Matt is no longer in the bedroom. Next thing she knows, she hears the sound of Naomi screaming, first in shock and then in pain.

Not thinking twice, Emily dashes out the door, and down the stairs. "Fucking Hell," she whispers to herself, her voice shaking. The seconds seem like centuries, and she can't seem to move herself fast enough. She has to get to Naomi. She has to protect her. She can't let this happen.

Bolting into the living room, Emily comes to an abrupt stop. The scene makes her whole body turn to noodles. She has to force herself not to fall on her face. Matt is standing over Naomi who is on the ground, her leg bent at an impossible angle. Her face is drenched in a combination of sweat and tears pouring out of her. She's crying, but not begging for her own life. She's begging for Emily's.

"Please, please, please," she babbles, "Don't hurt Emily." It's after that phrase, Emily and Naomi make eye contact. A second later, Emily dashes to sit in front of Naomi, covering her from any potential harm. "Aw, how fucking adorable." Matt says, empty of any emotion. For a second, Emily looks up and into Matt's eyes, hoping to see something more than evil. But they're empty. This isn't the same boy she met a year ago. That boy was sad, hurt, this guy is hateful, angry. Emily breaks the eye contact, squeezing her eyes tight, thinking of the way Naomi's blond hair flowed so perfectly, and her eyes glittered so bright on the beach in Mexico. This is what she wants to see. This is what's important to her.

The next second happens very, very slowly for Naomi. She hears the bang of the gun, and shuts her eyes waiting for the sting of the bullet to hit her skin, waiting to die. But she doesn't feel the sting, she just feels the weight of a body falling against her. She opens her eyes and sees that it's Emily, profusely bleeding from the bullet wound on her abdominal and leaning on her. Emily's chest is rising and falling quickly as she gulps for breaths frantically. Torture ensues around Naomi when all she can do is watch Emily's chaotic breaths get slower each time. Soon, she can't feel them at all. Naomi goes hysterical for a moment, feeling like her entire body is going to explode a thousand times over. "Emily!" she screams. She expects the next shot to come at any moment, but it doesn't. And, after a second, she can feel that not just her heart is beating. Emily's is too.

With a small amount of hope to grasp onto, Naomi looks up at Matt. Carefully, she places Emily's limp body behind her, protecting her small heart beats even if they're her last. Looking up at Matt, nothing more than a monster in her eyes, Naomi considers saying something to him, but she can't force herself to waste her last words on him. She'd rather have them be Emily's name. Matt's facial expression doesn't change as he slowly moves over to Naomi who refuses to break eye contact. Before she knows it, Matt is crouching beside her, putting himself just inches away from her face. "Fuck you," he spits as he jabs his gun into Naomi's temple. "I hate you," he says through his teeth. Naomi closes her eyes. All she sees is Emily. She feels her hand on her face and her eyes locking on hers. Naomi braces herself. She's not going to cry for Matt. She won't give him that.

Then, millions of gun shots ring around Naomi, but she doesn't feel a thing. She opens her eyes, but she can't make anything out. There is a lot of movement and chaos around her, but everything is blurry. She feels her entire body over, but doesn't find a single wound. She feels her heart beating, her breaths still coming. She's alive.

That's when her eyes focus. Matt's on the ground, bleeding from shots all over his body. Police officers frantically fill and move around the room, crowding around Matt and, even more so, Emily.

"Emily," Naomi whispers. She looks over at the pale, redhead girl with unforgettable eyes lying on the floor, mostly covered in blood. She doesn't move, not at all. Naomi looks over at Emily and something in her brain snaps, explodes. "Emily!" The whisper becomes a scream. She screams it again, and again, and again but can't find the strength to move herself over to her. "EMILY! PLEASE!" She bellows, tears flowing from her eyes. Two, strong hands grab Naomi, pulling her towards the front door of the flat. Naomi is loosing sight of Emily. Despite the fire she feels in her leg, Naomi thrashes around in the officers arms as he pulls her out. She hits, screams, flails, kicks, but none of it is enough. A moment later, Naomi's eyes are flooded with sunlight as she breaks outside. Her attacks become weaker, her yells quieter. The last thing she can here is Orbit by The Weepies on the stereo upstairs. A song off of the album that she and Emily danced to the night before they left for Mexico. The last thing she sees in her head is Emily's silhouette against the sunlight in the living room, the way Emily looked at her and smiled. A second later, Naomi feels her body stop moving, and her whole world go black.


	3. Chapter 3

The soft sand tickles the bottom of Naomi's feet as she looks out to the ocean. Looking at the blue waves that were created hundreds of miles away from where she is standing, Naomi realizes the vastness of the sea for the first time. "You want to go in?" Emily asks, coming up from behind her. Naomi turns to see Emily, the sun dancing on her skin in a way she's come to love. After leaning in for a quick kiss, she sees the light filling Emily's eyes from within, and the exterior glow of the sun sending a surge of warmth to whomever she looks at. After pushing a small strand of Emily's auburn hair out of her face, Naomi smiles, "My swimming costume is all the way back at the inn."  
"That never stopped us before," Emily says smiling. Naomi immediately picks up on her reference to the night she and Emily made love next to a camp fire near the pond. She smiles, looking over at the girlfriend she knows she's lucky to have. She smiles as Emily bites her bottom lip and looks around. "No one's nearby," Emily says, as she takes off her shirt. Chuckling, Naomi does the same, and the two of them run into the crashing waves, taking off their shorts and shoes as well.

In the water, they swim out together, splash each other, play together, until out of no where, Emily and Naomi hit the deeper water. They swim in closer to one another, and take a moment of tender looks and sweet smiles. Dazzled by Naomi's beauty against the blue water, Emily grabs hold of her, kissing her tenderly, pulling her in closer and closer. From behind, a large wave separates them, though, immediately they swim back to each other. Naomi finds herself looking deeply at Emily. The look is mutual, the feeling between them is mutual. They both want each other, crave each other.

Slowly, Naomi removes Emily bra, letting it fall into the deep water, and then she does the same with her own. Next they kick off their underwear, letting it fall into the ocean as well. Moment after moment passes as Naomi and Emily lean into each other. Finally, they grasp each other, determined not to let go for anything. Determined not to let go come Hell or high water.

"That was an amazing day," Naomi says to Emily, coming back to reality, as she rests her head next to her on the hospital bed after recounting the story out loud. Looking up at Emily, Naomi wants more than anything to see her move, even slightly, though she know that it won't happen, she knows that it can't yet.

"Effy will be here in a couple of days, probably in plenty of time for your surgery. I'll be here too, every moment." Naomi gently moves her hand to touch Emily's face, feel her soft skin again. She breathes in, missing terrible the way Emily's hand would feel inside hers. The way Emily would feel so perfect next to her, so warm.

For the past couple of weeks since the accident, Naomi has been reminding herself of different aspects of her and Emily's relationship every day so that she remembers every detail. She replays times they had together in her head so that she doesn't forget the way Emily moves, and she replays their conversations so that she doesn't forget the way Emily's voice sounds. Every single day, she feels Emily's skin, touches her hair so that she doesn't let go of that feeling. Every time Naomi comes to see Emily, she closes her eyes and reminds herself of the way Emily's smile lights up her world, and the way she feels when they're together. She will be damned before she lets even one detail slip her mind.

"Naomi," Naomi turns to see Katie, Emily's twin sister standing at the door. With all of her strength, Naomi tries to force a smile, but she can't make it happen. Her and Katie have had their problems in the past, but for the past few weeks, Katie has done anything she can to help Naomi cope with her broken leg and fix her breaking heart. She has also kept on top of Emily's doctors just as much as Naomi has and made sure to help Emily in anyway she can. Naomi knows that Katie is being nothing but amazing to her, but, right now, she's not strong enough to smile for anyone.

"You haven't eaten anything in a while, Naomes," Katie says, not moving from the door, "My mum wants to have some time with Em, and so I was wondering if you wanted to join me for a quick snack." Naomi looks back to Emily. If she were honest with Katie, she would tell her that the idea of leaving Emily's side, as well as the idea of eating anything at all, makes her sick, but she knows that she can't have Emily all to herself. Finally able to pull off the fake smile, Naomi looks back to Katie, "Sure, thanks."

Before pulling herself up, Naomi places her hand softly on Emily's face, a silent way of telling her that she'll be back. After she uses her crutches to get up, Naomi leans over to kiss Emily on the cheek, and then follows Katie out the door.

"So what are the doctors saying about your leg?" Katie asks as she picks out a variety of snacks from the cafeteria racks for both her and Naomi.  
"Not much," Naomi says, "I haven't really gone for a follow up yet."  
"Weren't you suppose to do that Tuesday?"  
"Yeah, I blew it off." Hearing the anger and pain in Naomi's voice, Katie looks over at her and then can see it in her eyes as well. All she wants is to make this alright again for her sister and her sister's girlfriend, but she knows there's not much that she can do. "Is your mum coming in soon?"  
"She's off traveling in Asia," Naomi chuckles, "It took me over a week to even get a hold of her, and when I did she freaked out. But she also told me that she couldn't manage coming home for a while. Actually, I don't know if Emily told you this, but me and Em were planning this...thing in a few months...and she was going to be home for that. So I'll see her then anyway." Katie is caught by surprise. Emily had not mentioned any sort of thing to her. Katie likes to know about every thing, and not knowing what the thing is bugs her. "Emily never mentioned anything to me," Katie says, almost snapping. Naomi sighs. She had, honestly, completely forgotten about the "sort-of wedding" she and Emily had been planning until that moment. "We just wanted to make it official, you know?" she says.  
"Make what official?" Katie asks as they take their seats at a table.  
"Us. It wouldn't _really _be a marriage, but we wanted to have a small ceremony where we tell the world that we're together and they suck our dicks if they don't like it. But mainly it was supposed to be a celebration," Naomi explains.

Katie feels her heart do back flips. First she's excited, and then sad, but then excited again. "Naomi that will be amazing," Katie says, "I can't believe Em didn't tell me any of this."  
"Well we just thought of it recently. And...now it might not happen." Naomi looks down, and Katie's smile fades. She knows that Naomi is considering the fact that she might loose Emily. She won't let her think like that. Katie herself can't think like that. Katie puts her hand on Naomi's shoulder. "It's going to happen," she promises her, "And it's going to be wonderful."


	4. Chapter 4

The moonlight peaking in through the small windows around the waiting room paints everything a dull shade of dark. It reflects off of the tiled floors and shines in a way that is almost beautiful if were not so gloomy. In the middle of the waiting area, Naomi is sitting on the floor, cradling a box of photos in her lap. She takes each photo out, one by one, and looks at it before putting it neatly on the floor in front of her. All of the photos are of her and Emily while they were traveling.

Naomi stops at one photo in particular, and looks at it longer than she does any of the others. In the photo, Emily is standing at the top of a mountain that they climbed. For the first time since the attack, a genuine smile crosses Naomi's face. She closes her eyes and breathes in, attempting to bring the way she felt that day back to her. She remembers the way that while she and Emily were climbing up, they were both chasing the feeling of being on top of the world. However, when they reached the peak, Naomi looked at Emily and realized that the redhead girl in front of her had put her on top of the world since the moment they met. She had already been above the clouds and so being on that mountain was nothing compared to having Emily to love.

Keeping her eyes shut, Naomi presses the picture to her heart, engraving the memory there to last forever, and then she tucks it away into her bag, knowing just were to save this picture.

"Hey," a voice stops Naomi before she can continue sorting pictures. She turns around to Effy, who is walking towards her, smiling. Naomi smiles back, however it doesn't feel the same as it did when she was looking at the picture. "Effy, hey," Naomi says. She reaches for her crutches and pulls herself up. Effy comes over to wrap her arms around Naomi even though she can't return it. "How's Emily?" Effy asks when she lets go. Naomi's already fake smile fades.  
"No change." For a moment, Effy and her just stand there, nodding, searching for something to say to break the tension of the moment.  
"What're you up to?" Effy asks, looking behind Naomi's shoulder at the photos lying all over the floor.  
"Well I was organizing the photos from me and Emily's trip. D'you want to see?"  
"Sure!"

Naomi leads Effy over to the pictures and then takes her seat back on the ground, and Effy sits next to her. "Alright, so I have them sorted by location." Naomi explains, showing Effy the three different, separated chucks. "These here," she says pointing to the left most chunk, "Are from the three weeks we spent in India. Goa, to be exact." Effy looks over the photos smiling.  
"Woah," she says, "It looks nice there."  
"Yeah," Naomi shrugs, "I mean it was all amazing, but Mexico was still our favorite of them all."  
"What's the middle section?" Effy asks.  
"Oh those are from the two weeks we spent in the United states. We went to an amusement park, and New York City, Los Angeles, and a music festival in Austin called ACL. It was great fun. Lots of weed there too."  
"You got baked while traveling?" Effy asks, laughing.  
"Only at the music festival," Naomi says, chuckling, "I mean I think it was kind of a big part of ACL. Like, a tradition you know? Listen to great music. Get blazed." Naomi picks up a photo of her and Emily smoking out of a bong and, between them a dirty guy with a long beard is giving a thumbs up to the camera. Effy holds the picture and laughs.

Next, Effy points to the final section. "And those," she says, "Are from Mexico." Naomi's face lights up slightly brighter as she turns her attention to her pictures with Emily in Mexico. "Yeah. We loved it there. We were planning to go back in a few months actually." As soon as Naomi says it, she regrets it.  
"Why's that?" Effy asks, still looking down at the pictures.  
"No reason," Naomi replies.

She had already wished that she hadn't mentioned the "not really wedding" to Katie, so she wasn't about to tell Effy. Whenever she tells someone, they get excited, and watching someone get excited about it makes Naomi feel excited about it and she can't afford to feel that way until she knows that Emily is going to be okay. And even then, she has to consider the fact that her girlfriend's feelings about her might change after everything that's happened.

Naomi's smile falls, and she's back to feeling the same way she did before she got the photos developed. Sad, alone, and angry at herself.

"This one is cute," Effy says, handing her a photo of Naomi and Emily wearing fake mustaches and sombreros, drinking tequila at a party they came across in Mexico city. Taking the photo, Naomi remembers the night that she and Emily had a mariachi party in their flat here in Bristol. A party much like the one they were at in the photo. The night that Emily left home, she came to stay with Naomi, and they spent the night listening to bad music and drinking cheap liquor. That night is one Naomi will never forget because, that same night, the truth about her and Sofia came out. The truth that led to Emily laying in a hospital bed with a bullet wound.

"I've got to go to the loo," Naomi says, stone faced as she uses her crutches to pull herself up. Effy looks up at her, concerned, and not immediately knowing what to do. "Are you alright," she says, "Do you need any help." By the time Effy extends the offer, Naomi is already coming close to the bathroom door and facing the opposite direction. "I'm fine," she says as she storms into the small restroom.

Looking at herself in the mirror, Naomi wants to hurl. Everything about that night floods back into her memory bank as if she had forgotten it and now remembered it for the first time. She hadn't forgotten that night, she never would, she'd never be able to, but now it's like a drill making it's way through her head. "Fuck," Naomi says, trying not to yell as she leans over the sink.

She sees herself back on the roof top of the club where Sofia had killed herself. She watches Matt storm past her and then turns back to see Emily standing at the edge of the building. And then, Emily says in a cold voice, "I could be dead in a second."

Cold water from the faucet hits Naomi's face as she uses her hands to splash herself, but she can still hear it playing over, and over, and over. "She could be dead in a second," Naomi says to herself, "Fuck!" She throws one of her crutches against the wall, and sits on the toilet seat, putting her wet face in her cold hands. There's a sharp knock on the door. "Naomi, are you alright?" Effy asks from the other side of the door. Her voice is filled with unmistakable concern.  
"Fine," she replies, "Just would like some privacy."  
"Alright," Effy says, but the tone of her voice, and the fact that she doesn't move away from the door, makes it obvious that she's still worried.

Naomi doesn't say anything back. Now she remembers why that day broke her apart. Seeing Emily standing over a ledge, just one step away from her death fucked with her mind in away nothing else ever had. Watching Emily walk away without even looking back at her, ripped something in her that just couldn't be mended. After Emily had left the club, Naomi walked all around Bristol before returning to her flat. The whole day, before Emily came home, her mind played ping pong between two ideas: how much she hurt Emily, and how much Emily had the ability to hurt her. It was Hell, but nothing compared to sitting in a hospital bathroom, not sure if your girlfriend is going to survive a gunshot she got because of your fuck up.

Suddenly, Naomi is very, very cold. She rubs her arms, trying to warm up, but she doesn't. She just stays cold, angry, hurt.

It takes a while but after she pulls herself together, Naomi swings the door open to walk out, but Effy is there blocking her way. "What are you waiting here for?"  
"You were in there forever. What the Hell took you so long?" Effy says coldly. Naomi begins moving back to where she had set out all of the photos on the ground. "Well excuse me for needing some time to clear my head."  
"You could have gone on a walk or something. You didn't have to lock yourself in the loo, throwing shit around, and not giving me one God damn reason. I mean, fuck, Naomi." Naomi stops, and looks at Effy. When she see's the pain in her expression and the sweat on her face, she remembers when Effy was the one in the hospital after cutting her wrists open. When she and Emily were the ones visiting, and Freddy was her. "How are you doing?" Naomi asks gently.  
"Later," Effy says, obviously annoyed, "Rob came out. Said that you could spend a few minutes with Emily now if you wanted to even though it's after visiting hours for non-family." Naomi's eyes widened. She had spent every night at this hospital since the night they came home, and not once had Rob or Jenna offered to allow her to see Emily after visiting hours. Her face relaxes, and Naomi almost smiles as she leaves the waiting area.

Walking into Emily's room, Naomi is disappointed as usual to see that there is no improvement. Nevertheless, she goes over and takes her seat in the chair next to the bed. "Hey, baby." She says softly. Gently, Naomi places her hand on Emily's beautiful face and smiles. The words fill her mind again _'I could be dead in a second.' _Instantaneously, Naomi's smile fades and tears form again in her eyes. "I'm sorry," she says, mimicking the way she pleaded up on the roof a year ago, "I'm so sorry." It takes a moment, but Naomi fights off the tears and then reaches into her bag, digging for something. "I brought you something." She pulls out the photo from the mountain. Smiling again, Naomi takes one of Emily's soft hands and places the photo under it. "I know I fucked it all up," Naomi says, "But the truth is I love you. And I always will, alright?"

A few last tears squeeze from Naomi's eyes, she goes to wipe them away, but doesn't have the chance. Suddenly, Emily's weak, shaky hand reaches up and dries them for her. Dumbfounded, Naomi slowly tilts her head up to see Emily's eyes slightly opened, and a small smile beaming off of her. "I know," she says in a small, quiet voice.

Hysterical, Naomi can no longer stop herself from crying, and all of her tears flood out at once as she leans in and kisses Emily's forehead, her lips, ears, everywhere a million times. She holds her face in her hand, as gently as she can and looks into Emily's eyes. They haven't changed a bit. "I thought I lost you," she cries. "I'm here," Emily says, getting a little bit stronger, "I always will be, alright?" For a while, no one says much else. Naomi just holds Emily in her arms, crying, as Emily smiles, happy just to see that Naomi is with her. They don't need words for that.

"So I'm not in Hell," Emily finally finds the breath to say, "Cause there's no way the Devil is as stunning as you." Hearing Emily talk breaks Naomi down into a puddle. "I love you," Naomi says, not being able to manage any other words, "I love you so much, and I'm so sorry I let this happen. Oh, God, Emily I am so sorry." Emily doesn't smile, but her face looks relaxed. Now, she puts her hand on Naomi's face, making her look more relieved than ever.  
"I love you, too," Emily says, "No matter what."

For that moment, everything is alright again in Naomi's world. Just for that moment, there is no big surgery planned for Emily tomorrow, or months of recovery. There's no guilt, or shame, or hate, or anger. For just that moment, all Naomi has in her world is Emily. And that's all she needs.


End file.
